I would return the slap if I took you for a man.
when people make plans in front of you
at one of the fob shows in australia pete was introducing young volcanoes but as a joke he called it confessions of a chronic masturbator and pATRICK FOUND IT SO FUNNY THAT HE HAD TO TAKE LIKE 10 MINUTES TO STOP LAUGHING AND HE WENT ALL PINK AND IT WAS SO CUTE
So I don’t think those free condoms universities hand out suck as much as guys say they do.
Okay, but seriously. If you’re ever considering sexy times with a guy and he tells you that he can’t wear a condom there is a 100.3% chance that he is a liar, and you should definitely not have sex with him. Don’t have sex with liars. Have sex with a cute honest people that bring you ice cream the next morning. Liars do not bring you ice cream. And if they do it’s ice cream made of lies. Ice cream made of lies is very emotionally unfulfilling. Don’t trust liars or their disease-ridden ice cream.
that was the best safe-sex talk ever.
yes im a boy
yes i knit things
This guy should be some crazy DC villain…
OH MY GOD YES PLEASE.
oh god someone do this
GET ON IT
I think I’ll call him… THE KNITTER!
He robs banks with the help of his little quilted monsters
can anyone put an end to his reign of warm and cozy terror!?
OMG YES ITS BACK
this post is perfect
me at my highschool reunion
me coming back to mcdonalds in the same day
reblog if u a alien but u wanna go home bc humans are kinda lame
Jennifer Lawrence filling gas while her dad flips off the paparazzi.
she learned from the best I see
when the internet takes a lil over a millisecond to load
when youtube videos automatically start without ads